At times you sit
In the darkness wondering,
What is it that I’m hearing?
What is it that I’m seeing?
Is this a vision,
is this a message
that I’m meant to be receiving?
While I sit and wonder
Can anyone else
Hear these words
That are echoing in my head,
Or see the epiphanies
Dancing, shaking,
Falling before my eyes?
Do you see what I see?
Do you hear what I hear?
These voices swarming
Inside my head,
Thoughts that are mangled,
Or incomplete,
Screaming for attention,
To be heard,
To be seen,
To be shaped and moulded
And put into a message
To give to someone else.
To give to those
in need of answers.
To give to those of
You who can’t see
what’s in front of you!
Where you see peace,
I see destruction.
Where you see fun,
I see self-harm
Much more violent
than hidden acts
in your room when
you feel nothing at all
and much more damaging
than a sharpened blade.
It’s standing in front
Of you screaming
In your face,
Wake up and see
All The damage that
you’re doing,
not just to yourself,
but to all those
around you.
Your way of life,
A constant pursuit of joy,
In vain as you’ll
Never find it where
You like to look.
Open your eyes and
Picture it if you can,
An endless cycle
That you don’t want
To escape from,
Trapped like the line
Forming the edge of
a circle,
destined to go round
till you’re as long
as a piece of string.
Do you see an end?
Do you see a goal?
Why even bother
If week in week out,
You do the same thing.
Make money,
Spend it.
Labour for money,
Throw it away.
Painstakingly earn
A handful of pennies
Just to fund another lap
Around you’re closed
Circuit track.
Take heed and notice
Before it’s too late.
Listen to the voices.
Accept what you see.
Change your ways
Before you drag everyone else
Who’s following Your lead
To their own dark room
And leave them there
To find the light
Switch for themselves.
Look closely now
At what’s in front of you.
Look past the illusion
Presented by those
Who are also misguided.
Listen to that voice
Speaking inside your head
And now tell me
If you see what I see.
Matthew PJ Watts 